ANEW: Four Ways to Reframe Christmas Eve
The beauty of expectations isn’t necessarily in their fulfillment; rather, it’s in the space they create.
As we approach Christmas, we often find ourselves in a flurry of preparations—wrapping presents, finalizing meals, and ensuring every detail is just right. The day before Christmas holds a unique place in this season, marked by the hum of anticipation. Yet, for all its excitement, Christmas Eve is often tethered to a singular expectation: the gifts under the tree. What if we could reframe this day to mean something more, something bold, something that honors the gap between our expectations and reality?
Expectations are a curious thing. We all have them, consciously or unconsciously, for ourselves and others. But the beauty of expectations isn’t necessarily in their fulfillment; rather, it’s in the space they create—the gap between what we hope for and what actually happens. Viktor Frankl, in his profound reflections on human resilience, recognized this space as fertile ground for creativity and meaning-making. It’s not about whether expectations are met but about how we engage with the possibilities they present.
Consider this: The day before Christmas is not just a prelude to unwrapping gifts. It’s a moment when expectations swirl around us. Children imagine the treasures they’ll discover. Adults anticipate the joy their gifts might bring to others. Families expect connection and harmony, though they may not always find it. This is the nature of the season—a symphony of hope, yearning, and potential disappointment.
But what if we leaned into the uncertainty of those expectations? Instead of focusing solely on outcomes, we could embrace the tension and ask ourselves: What are we creating in this moment of anticipation?
Here are four powerful ways to reframe Christmas Eve – and this season of expectations:
The Power of the Gap
A friend once shared with me her lifelong expectation of marriage. Now, at 50, she reflects on how that expectation shaped her life—not in its fulfillment, as she remains unmarried, but in the ways it guided her choices, relationships, and self-understanding. “Maybe I never will marry,” she said, “but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.” Her words struck me. It wasn’t the unfulfilled expectation that mattered but the life that emerged in its shadow.
Christmas Eve, too, is a time of potential unfulfilled expectations. The perfect gift might not arrive. The family dinner might be more tense than joyful. But within that gap lies an opportunity to create something meaningful. Expectations can be generative, not because they are always met but because they call us to imagine, hope, and connect.
Reframing Christmas Eve
Thanksgiving has been beautifully reframed as a day for gratitude. What if we reframed Christmas Eve as a day to celebrate expectations—not for their results but for their existence? To honor the dreams, hopes, and imaginings that make us human.
For families, this could mean taking a moment to share not just what they’re thankful for but what they’re looking forward to, what they dream about, and what they hope for one another. Parents could talk with their children about the importance of imagination and patience. Partners could share their visions for the future, acknowledging that those dreams are valuable, even if they shift over time.
This reframing could also shift how we approach disappointment. If Christmas morning doesn’t look like a Hallmark movie, we might remind ourselves—and our children—that the beauty of Christmas isn’t just in what we receive but in what we imagine, what we strive for, and how we connect along the way.
Cultivating Creative Expectation
Viktor Frankl taught us that meaning is found not in what happens to us but in how we respond. On Christmas Eve, this response could take the form of creativity. Instead of clinging to the idea of a “perfect” Christmas, we could embrace the imperfections and use them as opportunities to grow closer as families and communities.
Imagine a family tradition where each person shares their wildest hope for the coming year—something they know may not happen but that inspires them to dream. Or a moment where parents encourage their children to write down one thing they’d like to do for someone else in the coming year, reinforcing the idea that expectations aren’t just about receiving but also about giving.
In these small ways, we can turn Christmas Eve into a celebration of the human capacity to dream and to navigate the space between what we want and what we have.
A Bold Reimagining
What would it mean to live in a world where Christmas Eve wasn’t just about last-minute wrapping or fretting over the menu but about intentional reflection on our shared expectations? This shift could transform not only the holiday season but also how we approach our lives.
Families could come together not to perfect the material aspects of Christmas but to embrace the messiness of hope and the beauty of imperfection. Children could learn that their imaginations are as valuable as the gifts they unwrap. Adults could find joy in the act of hoping, regardless of outcomes.
Let’s make Christmas Eve a bold statement about what it means to be human—a celebration of our ability to dream, to connect, and to find meaning in the in-between spaces. Because the truth is, the day before Christmas isn’t just about waiting for gifts. It’s about waiting, period. And in that waiting, we find the seeds of creativity, love, and wonder.
So this Christmas Eve, as the world quiets down and the air fills with anticipation, take a moment to sit with your expectations. Honor them, not for what they promise but for what they inspire. And remember, the beauty of this season isn’t just in what we receive—it’s in the dreams we dare to hope for and hold.
Curated Listening:
During the Spring of 2020, I came across Shades of Yale, an a cappella singing group whose song about hope went viral during the Pandemic when they couldn’t gather together. I dare you not to get goosebumps when they break into “We Shall Overcome.” Watch Shades of Yale sing a plaintiff rendition of “Amen/We Shall Overcome” HERE.